the smile looks more pained on her lips than anything . there had been too much pain ; the pain of losing loved ones . the pain of knowing a monster had been allowed to roam freely and live his life without being punished for the horrible crimes . the pain of nearly losing another special life.
the image plays itself over and over in her head , still too fresh ; emma doubts it will ever vanish into the world of non existence , so she doesn’t have to remember it . but boy , does she wish it would ? she can still feel her heart pounding against her ribcage , threatening to split it open ; emma had never known fear until she saw a gun pressed against the head of someone she loved . she almost lost her . still , she chooses to hide her true emotions beneath the surface , away from everyone , away from caroline who doesn’t need this right now .
❝ you’re not crazy . ❞ come the whispered words . pale arms slip around the older woman’s thin waist , holding on a little tighter than she usually would ( and no one can blame her for it ) , head resting against caroline’s shoulder . ❝ we are . but are you ? are you free , caroline ? ❞ they both know her words hold a much deeper meaning to them .
she opened her mouth, dead silence falling between the two, blonde women as caroline struggled to find the right answer to emma’s question. was she, truly free? perhaps one day she would be, the memories still too fresh, too present for hubbard to leave the past behind and —- be free. a smile twitched up the corners of her mouth; though small, she wasn’t faking it. not this time, for emma deserved so much better than yet another performance.
❝ i’m hopeful i will be. is that good enough for you? ❞ tracing the sharpness of the woman’s cheekbone, fingertips that touched and felt and soothed, caroline brought an untouched cigarette to her own mouth and placed it between her lips. a silver lighter was pulled out of emma’s pocket, elegantly rolled between her fingers and then set on top of her open palm as she offered it to her.
some things never changed, caroline wanted to feel taken care of. like the refined woman she was. ❝ but let’s not talk about it anymore, how does that sound? we should eat, and drink. ❞